“Good girl” makes your praise kink leap in joy… but now what?
No one really explains what praise kink actually is or how to explore it further in real life. Especially if you don’t have a partner.
Sometimes it’s our boyfriends that haven’t gotten the memo. Thinking grunting out a “good girl” here and there is all that’s needed.
Not only is there a way to help your partner up his dirty talk game but there’s also a way to explore your new praise kink alone. And no, it doesn’t include talking to yourself in the dark.
Just a fair warning: I’ll mention some explicit stories and praise kink asmr phrases here, so if you are reading this in a place where you might have a curious stranger peeking over your shoulder, you may want to save this article for later.
What exactly is praise kink?
Fun fact, praise kink is actually one of the most popular kinks women have.
How do I know? We asked hundreds of women. You can read more about it here, if you are interested: 11 Surprising Kinks Women Found Through Audio Erotica
In simple words, a praise kink is being turned on by words of affirmation or validation. It can be during sexy time, in a romantic setting, or, sometimes, quite unexpectedly, when you find yourself aroused by random praise that wasn’t even meant to be sexual. Talk about bad timing.
The good old “Good girl” and “you are doing so well for me” seems to do it for most people with praise kink. One audio erotica listener wrote:
“OMG… just one “good girl” and a few “princess” and Mr. Robinson is forgiven for any assholishness. I need an intervention..” (source).
I’ll admit being praised has definitely made me go from heavy bratting to preening like a 50s housewife more times than I want to count.
So, guys, praise definitely could be your secret superpower!
But does this mean women need a sonnet about how beautiful we look, gagging on his length every time? No, but a well-placed “atta girl” and telling me how proud you are has been known to get an enthusiastic reward.
What does a praise kink sound like?
We all know that sexuality is a spectrum but that also applies to kinks as well. There’s no ‘praise kink bible’ that we can reference to in the middle of sex that’ll tell us how or when to say things.
What might sound like praise to one person, can come across as degradation to others.
No one is denying that a well-placed “Good girl,” will make even the most experienced of us buckle.
But let’s admit that it can get a bit overdone. And a quick search on google for “praise kink phrases” doesn’t yield much better results; which is a shame given how much material there is out there for it.
As you start to get more comfortable, you’ll find your own specific phrases and words that will send that zing deep under your belly button.
But until then, here are some phrases to play around with either alone or with a partner to test how it feels.
- “You’re doing such a good job for me.”
- “I’m so proud of you.”
- “Your pussy looks so pretty, swallowing me up like that.”
- “Keep going just like that. You know just how I like it.”
Bonus: Derogatory Praise
- “What a dirty little eager sl*t you are, taking me so well.”
If you would like to learn more phrases or understand what exactly you like, audio erotica is an amazing tool for this.
If you’ve never heard of audio erotica, it’s a topic for another article, so I’ll just link a post on it here and you can do your research on your own time 😉
How do I know if I have a praise kink?
If you’re reading this article for yourself then the answer is probably, you have one. But there are a couple of great ways how to find out for sure.
Have a conversation with yourself
I know, I know… groundbreaking.
But really, just have a conversation with yourself in your thoughts or while you’re lying in bed aroused.
Imagine being intimate with a partner you truly trust (fictional or real) what are they saying to you?
What are you saying back?
Is there something in particular they’re saying that’s exciting you the most?
If you’re having a hard time thinking of the dirty talk you’re wanting to hear, audio erotica and praise kink asmr is a great way to just sit back and listen from a first person perspective as the voice actor talks you through it.
Which leads us to our next point.
Listen to praise kink asmr
Audio erotica is like a “free trial” for your kinks.
If you have never heard of audio erotica, it’s basically like a roleplay audio-movie with you as the main star: an amazing, deep voice whispers sexy things in your ear, while you get to imagine the rest. You can read more about audio erotica here.
But the best part about audio erotica is that it feels so real. It’s like a real partner talking dirty to you and you can observe your reactions to his words.
Did the “good girl” make you squirm?
Does “Yeah, that’s the spot, baby. That’s it” make you wanna suck more and suck harder?
If your answers are both yeses, then you probably have a praise kink.
Or how about him calling you names didn’t quite hit the spot? Probably degradation isn’t your thing then and better leave it out of your bedroom life IRL.
Listening to audio erotica can reveal so much about yourself. Sometimes, things you had no idea about.
If you need some recommendations to start with, here you can browse over 100 praise kink asmr stories. Or scroll down to the bottom of the article for my favourite praise kink audios.
Read erotica books
Books, similar to audio erotica, can reveal a lot about your likes and dislikes. It can take a little while to find the right book that has the dirty talk you want to test on yourself.
Unfortunately, I don’t have any recommendations, as I don’t read that many erotica novels nowadays. But I am sure a quick Google search will yield some results.
I have a partner. How do I tell them I have a praise kink?
Chances are if your partner has been paying attention, they already know.
My husband and I affectionately call the praise kink, “the love language” kink for a reason. Words of affirmation are a huge hit for people with praise kinks!
If you feel you aren’t being given enough praise during sex, like most things in life an open and honest conversation is fundamental. It doesn’t have to be lengthy or formal in the slightest.
If you and your partner are already comfortable talking about sex, it can be as easy as saying:
“Hey, I really like it when you notice the extra effort I’m putting in to please you and would love it if you told me more about the things I do to you that you enjoy, while it’s happening.”
Or if you aren’t as comfortable being so direct I’ve mentioned before how my husband and I like to sit together while cuddling and talk about what we liked and didn’t like about previous experiences. This opens the floor for your partner to start off with what they enjoyed and for you to feed off of that with your own.
Either way you approach it, you just want to make sure you both are coming from a place of mutual respect without judgment.
How can I incorporate my Praise Kink into the bedroom? Can I even explore this alone?
Of course you can! And even better than in porn where you feel like the fly on the wall watching someone else live out your fantasy.
The easiest and quickest way to jump straight into exploring your praise kink at home alone is through praise kink asmr.
You don’t necessarily need a partner this way, as the audio fills that role.
You also don’t have to worry about what to say and can let him take the lead without worrying about someone looking over your shoulder at what you’re searching.
Since BKS has an extensive library of different stories the praise you’ll receive can be as realistic or fantastical as you need it to be.
How do I get my partner to be more verbal with me?
If your partner seems hesitant to speak or dirty talk doesn’t really come naturally to them you might have to take on more of the verbal role, in the beginning.
If you’re more submissive in nature, that might make you a bit nervous but really, you shouldn’t overthink what you’re saying.
In my experience, what will turn on your partner the most is your enthusiasm. So the more they see you getting into it the more naturally they will want to as well.
Keep in mind since you’re trying to get your partner to praise you, your dirty talk should be about what you’re doing for them. Allowing him the ability to respond to what you’re saying.
You can be as filthy as your desires tell you to be.
Saying things like ‘Do you like the way I’m playing with your balls right now?”
Or you can get more specific, mentioning the erogenous zones you know your partner is sensitive to: ‘I remember how much you love it when I curl my tongue around your head like this. Can I do that more for you?’
If you’re still asking those questions during and all you’re getting back is a “yeah” or “oh God yes,” but you’re looking for more, tell him that.
Literally. Look him in the eyes and ask him to tell you how much he likes what you’re doing.
‘Does that feel good baby? Tell me. Tell me how much of a good girl I’m being for you.’
Or even ‘Do you see how wet I am for you daddy? Tell me how turned on you are for me.’
These are your desires and you deserve to feel fulfilled when you have sex as well. So try and bury your embarrassment and speak from how you feel. The right partner won’t shame you for what you say in the heat of the moment.
My favourite praise kink ASMR audios
I’ve curated three of my favorite praise kink asmr repeaters below. Enjoy!
You Belong to Me – Mr Robinson
”I want you to understand that you are mine. I don’t want any other guy getting too close to you.”
Oh the tags said “toxic ex” and toxic this man became. We weren’t even a minute in and I would’ve pushed him out from the way he said “cussing” alone.
Immediately this audio immerses you in its universe with the too realistic sound of the phone ringing to even the televangelist in the background.
His barely restrained tone as he talks about how jealous he gets whenever you’re around other men, the gaslighting.
Never free me from fictional men.
“You feel so good just like that. Yes baby keep grinding. You want to suck on my fingers. Yeah? Good girl.”
Fuck me!
Mr. Chambers may have the most natural sounding kisses to me but no one has been able to beat Robinsons wet sounds. He laps at her nipples and clit with languid enthusiasm and that even, deep, way he talks just adds to it.
The constant “I gotchu’s” while he fucks into her from behind made a mess of me.
You can almost picture his eyes darkening as he watches the listener grow more and more undone and it makes you want to work harder for him just so he doesn’t stop speaking.
Listen to: You Belong to Me on: Youtube or Patreon
Honeymoon Night – Chambers
If you normally steer clear from virginity audios because they focus too much on how little experience the listener has, this story had none of that.
This audio is all about your pleasure, and your new husband takes his time telling you that to great lengths.
The pacing is slow in an intoxicatingly rich, seductive way.
Running his hands up and down your body while he comments on how much he cherishes every bit.
“Feeling how warm you’ve got.
Trembling slightly from how excited you are. It makes me so happy to see that you’re enjoying this.”
At one point the listener comes out in lingerie and doesn’t feel the most comfortable. His assurance that he just loves her even if she’s naked was the sexiest thing he could’ve said at that moment.
The sex starts patient and gentle but hearing the wetness from his thrusts while he grunts softly in your ear would’ve opened me right up as well.
Add on his constant “I love you’s” while he rubs her clit, doing everything he can to make her cum more than once.
After that first orgasm around his cock you start to see his restraint start to crack and his passionate side poke through.
“You’re so brave. That’s it my love, moan with me… you’re perfect.” It’s like he’s trying to melt me into the mattress.
Listen to: Honeymoon Night on: Youtube or Patreon
Long Night – Gallo
This audio is just pure praise kink asmr through and through.
It starts with a very pussy whipped Gallo talking to his friends on a night out about how amazing his girlfriend (the listener) is.
Then gushing about her to a “stranger” on the street not knowing he’s confessing it all to her. I rarely call a grown man adorable but that’s exactly what he gives off here… until the next day.
Morning sex hits different when you’ve been with a man all night and he’s continuously been listing everything he loves about you until he passes himself out.
“She’s so fucking hot. She’s so fucking incredible. She’s so smart. She’s so kind to other people…” I think that deserves his face being sat on first thing in the morning for sure.
He doesn’t stop those lovingly affectionate bits of praise throughout the entire fuck session. Constantly mentioning how sexy she is while her eyes are rolling into the back of her head. I’d say that was the first time I’ve ever agreed to calling a blowjob romantic.
Listen to: Long Night on: Youtube or Patreon
(MMMF) Ours – Mr Robinson, Mr. Gallo, Mr. Chambers
Any excuse to talk about this audio and I’m there.
If you’re really looking to take your praise kink for a test drive this audio has a bit of everything for everyone.
Each man takes on a different dominant role so you can hear each bit of phrase from derogatory name-calling to soft and gentle affection.
Chamber’s calling me a good girl while falling asleep hits right where it needs to with that gravely gentle voice of his.
Add on Robinson’s jealous exhibitionism as he tells you to moan their names and Gallo’s hard domination. It’s like getting whiplash between all three. That aftercare was definitely appreciated.
Everyone in this friend group has been holding back how badly they’ve wanted each other for so long, it’s electric hearing how passionately the VA’s voices play off each other.
“Swallow it like a good little fucking cum whore. Good little needy little slut is that what you wanted?” Yeah, hearing that being said about another man’s cum in my mouth definitely made me short-circuit.
Disclaimer: This is a foursome asmr audio that has three separate voice actors at the same time. Some of our listeners have mentioned that it was a bit too sensory stimulating for them, so if you have auditory sensitivities please keep that in mind before proceeding. There are a lot of male moans in this one and trust me it’s very difficult to stay unaffected.
Listen to: Ours on: Youtube or Patreon
If you had as much fun listening to these praise kink audios as I did, then you’ve just made my day! It’s such a fun kink to explore, and it can open the doors to new pleasure-highs, which is ultimately what we want, right?
If you liked the audios I listed and need some more, Best Kept Secret has over one hundred spicy, sexy, panty-melting erotic audios that feature praise kink, so, go have your fun!
And before I go, I just wanted to mention that you don’t need to rush to put a label on your kinks or figure out right away exactly which category you belong to.
As you continue to explore your desires and play out your fantasies, you’ll likely notice your kinks starting to evolve, too. It’s helpful to have other people you can ping ideas back and forth with before actually trying them, and BKS has an amazing Discord community that prioritizes safety and sexual education for interaction and learning. But other than that, don’t worry about whether what you like is called a praise kink or some other kink. As long as you are enjoying it, that’s what truly matters!
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